At an NBC promotional party

David Beckham: I like America, to be honest with you, but some of these events can be bores, Cris.

Cristiano Ronaldo: It's difficult partying with the typical boors you find at these parties. I am surprised though. These people aren't as dreadful as I was anticipating.

Beckham: Back when the English Premier League was on Fox and ESPN, it was all about pairing us with American footy players. I grew weary of Tom Brady and his wife. I can run into Brazilians at work, thank you very much.

Ronaldo: Yes, but these aren't the ugly, fashionblind people I was expecting.

Sidney Crosby: Hello gentlemen, on behalf of the Pittsburgh Penguins and the NHL, it's a pleasure to have English soccer in the fold.

Ronaldo: You know that officially, I'm not in the EPL? I play for Real Madrid at present.

Sean Avery: Hey, that's cool, I don't play in the NHL either. 

Beckham: I was just telling Cris how much more delightful you are than those numbskulls in the NFL. I even detected a few international accents! 

Ronaldo: It's not as bad as I was figuring. A party is always better with beautiful people.

Crosby: That's very kind of you, thank you.

Avery: Yes, we play a tough game, but there is no shortage of pretty people playing in the NHL

/everyone laughs

/door flies open



About Ryan Henning

Ryan has been working online since 2003 and is presently the proprietor of Barry Melrose Rocks, The Rhino and Compass and The Weather Blog at Victoria-Weather.